199+ Funny & Creative Blonde Jokes

Blonde jokes have been making people laugh for years with their playful humor and lighthearted charm. 

These jokes often add a touch of creativity and hilarity to brighten anyone’s day. 

Whether you’re looking to share a quick laugh with friends or need a funny pick-me-up, this collection of 199+ funny and creative blonde jokes is packed with entertainment for everyone. 

Get ready to giggle and enjoy the fun!

The Benefits of Choosing Funny Blonde Jokes

• Promotes Positivity: Laughter uplifts moods and spreads joy effortlessly.

• Encourages Social Bonding: Sharing jokes fosters connections and strengthens relationships.

• Boosts Creativity: Clever wordplay inspires witty thinking.

• Relieves Stress: Humor lightens daily worries and offers a mental break.

• Universal Appeal: Their playful tone makes them enjoyable for all!

Funny & Creative Blonde Jokes

1. Why did the blonde get a perm? Because her mom said she needed a permanent wave goodbye.
2. What did the blonde say when she looked in a box of Cheerios? “Oh look, doughnut seeds!”
3. Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? It said, “concentrate.”
4. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
5. What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair brunette? Artificial intelligence.
6. A blonde was asked to spell “farm.” She said, “E-I-E-I-O.”
7. Why did the blonde put her new computer on the floor? So she could run a program.
8. How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.
9. A blonde and a brunette are in a forest. The brunette says, “Look, a dead bird!” The blonde looks up and asks, “Where?”
10. Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house.
11. What’s the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
12. Why don’t blondes play hide-and-seek? Because no one will look for them.
13. What did the blonde say after the doctor told her she was pregnant? “Is it mine?”
14. Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? She kept throwing out the ‘W’s.
15. A blonde goes to the library and asks, “Can I have a burger and fries?” The librarian says, “This is a library.” The blonde whispers, “Sorry. Can I have a burger and fries?”
16. How does a blonde’s brain cell die? Alone.
17. Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead? She wanted to make up her mind.
18. What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.
19. A blonde saw a sign that said, “Wet Floor.” So she did.
20. Why do blondes have more fun? They are easier to amuse.

Read Also: 199+ Funny & Creative Train Jokes

Blonde Jokes for Kids

1. What did the blonde say when she saw a banana peel? “Oh no, I’m going to slip again!”
2. Why did the blonde take a ruler to bed? To see how long she slept.
3. How does a blonde turn on the light after a party? She opens the car door.
4. Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? She didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills.
5. What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? Pregnant.
6. Why did the blonde climb over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.
7. How did the blonde try to catch a fish? With a camera.
8. Why was the blonde happy she finished the puzzle in 6 months? The box said “2-4 years.”
9. What’s a blonde’s favorite nursery rhyme? Hump-me Dump-me.
10. A blonde and a redhead are walking. The redhead says, “My feet hurt.” The blonde asks, “Why don’t you run faster?”
11. Why did the blonde bring a spoon to the movie? She heard there would be sundaes.
12. How do you keep a blonde busy? Give her a piece of paper with “flip over” written on both sides.
13. What did the blonde name her pet zebra? Spot.
14. Why did the blonde put her clothes on a magnet? She wanted to wear an attractive outfit.
15. A blonde asked her friend, “How do you spell ‘mouse’?” Her friend replied, “M-O-U-S-E.” The blonde said, “I know that, but what about the little gray thing?”
16. Why did the blonde sit on the clock? She wanted to be on time.
17. What does a blonde call her goldfish? Bob.
18. Why don’t blondes eat pickles? They can’t get their head in the jar.
19. How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? She fell out of the tree.
20. Why did the blonde sell her car? She couldn’t afford the gasoline to drive it home.

Blonde Girl Jokes

1. Why was the blonde girl standing in front of the mirror with her eyes closed? She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
2. A blonde girl complains, “All my life, people have been walking all over me.” Her friend says, “You should get a job as a speed bump.”
3. What is a blonde girl’s favorite question? “What’s my name again?”
4. Why did the blonde girl get so excited after finishing a puzzle in six months? The box said “From 2-4 years.”
5. How can you tell if a blonde girl has been using the computer? There’s Wite-Out on the screen.
6. A blonde girl is on a flight. She asks the flight attendant, “What’s the plane’s number?” The attendant says, “305.” The blonde says, “Wow, it flies upside down too?”
7. What do you do if a blonde girl throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.
8. Why did the blonde girl put her iPad in the blender? She wanted to make an Apple smoothie.
9. A police officer pulls over a blonde girl and asks for her license. She says, “What’s a license?” He says, “The rectangular thing with your picture.” She finds her makeup mirror and hands it to him. He looks and says, “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were a cop too.”
10. What did the blonde girl say to the physicist? “Everything is so relative!”
11. How does a blonde girl spell “cat”? C-A-T. How does she spell “dog”? D-A-W-G.
12. Why did the blonde girl think the moon was more important than the sun? Because it gives light at night when we need it more.
13. A blonde girl reports her car stolen. The police officer asks, “Did you get a look at the thief?” She replies, “No, but I got the license plate number.”
14. Why did the blonde girl wear a wet T-shirt to her job interview? She wanted to show she could handle pressure.
15. What’s a blonde girl’s idea of a balanced diet? A cookie in each hand.
16. How do you sink a submarine full of blonde girls? Knock on the door.
17. Why did the blonde girl fail her driving test? She got confused by the parked cars.
18. What did the blonde girl say when she saw a “STOP” sign? “Wow, someone thought of everything!”
19. Why don’t blonde girls call 911 in an emergency? They can’t find the “eleven” button.
20. A blonde girl walked into a bar and asked for a water. The bartender shouted, “BOO!” She ran out crying.

Blonde Hair Jokes

1. A woman asks her blonde friend, “Why is your hair wet?” The blonde replies, “I was just washing it.” The woman says, “But you don’t have a towel.” The blonde says, “Who uses a towel to wash their hair?”
2. What’s the advantage of having blonde hair? You get better parking spots.
3. Why do people with blonde hair have more fun? Their expectations are lower.
4. A man says to his blonde girlfriend, “Your hair smells terrific.” She says, “Thanks, I just got my head out of the car wash.”
5. My friend said I look good with blonde hair. I told her, “Thanks, it’s natural…ly from a box.”
6. How do you know you’re talking to a blonde? When they ask if your blonde hair is natural.
7. A woman with blonde hair walked into a salon and asked for a haircut. The stylist said, “How do you want it?” She said, “Just like yours, but better.”
8. Why did the blonde get her hair insured? In case of a dye-saster.
9. What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette? An identity crisis.
10. Why did the blonde put her money in her hair? She wanted to have rich follicles.
11. I told my blonde friend I was going to get highlights. She asked if I was making a movie.
12. Why did the blonde stand on one leg? She wanted to balance her hair color.
13. What’s the main ingredient in blonde shampoo? Water.
14. A blonde complains, “This hair dye says it lasts for 8 weeks, but it’s only been two!”
15. What did the blonde say about her new haircut? “It’s growing on me.”
16. How many hair stylists does it take to do a blonde’s hair? None, they just spray paint it.
17. What do you call a bad hair day for a blonde? A brunette.
18. Why was the blonde’s hair so big? It was full of secrets.
19. A blonde and a brunette are talking. The brunette says, “I’m thinking of going blonde.” The blonde says, “Don’t, you’ll regret it.”
20. Why do blondes use see-through lunch boxes? So they can see if it’s lunch or dinner.

Blonde Guy Jokes

1. How do you get a blonde guy on the roof? Tell him the drinks are on the house.
2. What did the blonde guy say when he saw a sign for a “freezer burn”? He went home to get his jacket.
3. Why did the blonde guy bring a car door to the desert? So he could roll down the window if it got hot.
4. A blonde guy and his friend are working on a roof. The blonde guy starts sliding off. He yells, “Help me! What do I do?” His friend yells back, “Grab onto something!”
5. How do you make a blonde guy’s eyes twinkle? Shine a flashlight in his ear.
6. Why did the blonde guy stare at the frozen orange juice? Because the can said “concentrate.”
7. A blonde guy asked his boss if he could have a day off. The boss said, “It looks like you already took it.”
8. What do you call a handsome, intelligent, and sensitive blonde guy? A rumor.
9. Why did the blonde guy get fired from his job at the keyboard factory? He wasn’t putting in enough shifts.
10. A blonde guy goes to a doctor and says, “Doctor, everywhere I touch, it hurts.” The doctor says, “You have a broken finger.”
11. What did the blonde guy do when he heard 90% of accidents happen in the home? He moved.
12. Why did the blonde guy have a one-way street sign in his living room? To remind him of his career path.
13. How did the blonde guy try to kill a bird? He threw it off a cliff.
14. A blonde guy sees a sign: “Tree Trimmers.” He walks in and says, “I’d like to buy one.”
15. Why did the blonde guy put his TV in the oven? He wanted to watch a cooking show.
16. Two blonde guys are in a car. One asks, “Are we there yet?” The other says, “I don’t know, the sign says ‘Clean Restrooms Ahead.'”
17. Why did the blonde guy sell his water skis? He couldn’t find any lakes with hills.
18. A blonde guy is taking a shower and yells, “Honey, can you bring me a towel?” His wife says, “You have three in there!” He says, “Yeah, but they’re all wet.”
19. Why was the blonde guy proud of finishing a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months? The box said 2-4 years.
20. A blonde guy walks into a store and says, “I’d like to buy this TV.” The cashier says, “Sorry, we don’t sell to blondes.” The next day, he comes back wearing a wig. The cashier says, “I told you, we don’t sell to blondes.” The guy says, “How did you know?” The cashier says, “Because that’s a microwave.”

Blonde Redhead Brunette Jokes

1. A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a lamp with a genie who grants them one wish each. The redhead wishes to be smart enough to get off the island. Poof, she builds a raft and leaves. The brunette wishes to be even smarter. Poof, she builds a speedboat and leaves. The blonde wishes to be a redhead.
2. Why do brunettes tell blonde jokes? It gives them something to do.
3. A brunette tells her blonde friend, “I bet you can’t tell me two words that start with ‘I’ and ‘M’.” The blonde says, “I’m possible!”
4. A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are in a bar watching the news. A man is on a ledge about to jump. The brunette says, “I bet $50 he jumps.” The redhead says, “I bet $50 he doesn’t.” The blonde says nothing. He jumps. The brunette says, “I can’t take your money, I saw this on the news earlier.” The redhead says, “Me too, but I didn’t think he’d do it again.”
5. What’s the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The brunette knows the difference.
6. How do you know a brunette has been using the computer? There are correction fluid marks on the screen. How do you know a blonde has been using it? There are correction fluid marks on the correction fluid marks.
7. A blonde and a brunette are walking their dogs. The brunette says, “My dog can do tricks.” The blonde says, “My dog thinks it’s a person.”
8. Why did the brunette cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stapled to the chicken.
9. A blonde and a redhead are looking at a cow. The blonde says, “What’s that?” The redhead says, “It’s a cow.” The blonde says, “What are those things on its head?” The redhead says, “Horns.” A car horn beeps and the blonde says, “Oh, good, one of them is leaving.”
10. A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped in a haunted house. They have to pass through three rooms. The first is full of fire, the second with tigers, and the third with assassins. The redhead runs through the fire and gets burned. The brunette runs past the tigers and gets eaten. The blonde walks through all three rooms unharmed. How? The fire was fake, the tigers were stuffed, and the assassins were playing chess.
11. What is the similarity between a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead at a bar? They’re all waiting for a drink.
12. Why don’t brunettes like blonde jokes? They can’t understand them.
13. A blonde and a brunette are driving. They get a flat tire. The brunette says, “We need a jack.” The blonde says, “I don’t have one, but I have an ace.”
14. What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A mind block.
15. A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are applying for a job. The interviewer asks the redhead, “What’s 2+2?” She says, “4.” He asks the brunette, “What’s 2+2?” She says, “4.” He asks the blonde, “What’s 2+2?” She says, “Could you repeat the question?”
16. A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. They hide in a barn. The brunette hides in a potato sack, the redhead in a grain sack, and the blonde in an empty sack. The police come in and kick the potato sack. The brunette goes, “Meow!” They kick the grain sack. The redhead goes, “Woof!” They kick the empty sack. The blonde goes, “Potatoes!”
17. Why do blondes smile when there’s lightning? They think their picture is being taken. Why do brunettes? They’re turning on the flash.
18. A brunette says to a blonde, “I slept with a Brazilian last night.” The blonde says, “Oh my God, how many is a Brazilian?”
19. A blonde and a brunette jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? The brunette. The blonde had to stop and ask for directions.
20. A blonde and a brunette are in a desert. The brunette says, “I’m so thirsty.” The blonde says, “Me too, but I have a car door. If I get hot, I can roll down the window.”

Unique Blonde Jokes One Liners

1. I asked my blonde friend to pass the salt, and she did a somersault.
2. My blonde friend thinks a quarterback is a refund.
3. A blonde went to the eye doctor; she couldn’t see the problem.
4. My blonde neighbor’s dog is named “Five Miles,” so she can say she walks Five Miles every day.
5. A blonde bought a new phone but returned it because the home button didn’t take her home.
6. My blonde friend tried to make holy water by boiling the hell out of it.
7. A blonde tried to steal a free sample.
8. I told a blonde to change the channel, so she stood up and started dancing.
9. A blonde thought a “screenshot” was a picture taken from behind a screen door.
10. My blonde friend thinks “manual labor” is a Spanish guy who works in construction.
11. A blonde thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new type of computer.
12. I told my blonde sister her roots were showing, so she started talking about her family tree.
13. A blonde thinks a “firewall” is a new home renovation trend.
14. A blonde thought “carpooling” was just swimming in her car.
15. My blonde friend thinks HTML is a new kind of breakfast cereal.
16. A blonde asked me if I could “burn” a CD for her, so I set it on fire.
17. My blonde friend thinks a “hard drive” is just a difficult road trip.
18. A blonde thought “going viral” was a new type of flu.
19. My blonde friend was confused when I said the book had a “spine.”
20. A blonde believes “cookies” on a computer are just digital snacks.

Dirty Blonde Jokes

1. What’s the difference between a blonde and a golf ball? You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
2. Why are blonde jokes so short? So brunettes can remember them.
3. What do a blonde and a beer bottle have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.
4. What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde’s head? A space invader.
5. How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she’s pregnant.
6. Why did God make blondes? Because sheep can’t fetch a beer from the fridge.
7. What’s a blonde’s favorite wine? “I wanna go to Napa.”
8. Why don’t blondes eat bananas? They can’t find the zipper.
9. What’s the best way to get a blonde’s attention? “Excuse me, isn’t that your car being towed?”
10. What’s a blonde’s idea of safe sex? Locking the car doors.
11. What did the blonde’s left leg say to the right leg? “Nothing, they’ve never met.”
12. Why do men prefer blonde jokes? Because they can understand them.
13. What’s the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Goes home.
14. How can you tell if a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies? There are M&M shells all over the floor.
15. Why do blondes wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm.
16. What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted.
17. A blonde is at a bar and her friend asks, “Why the long face?” She replies, “I just found out my husband is having an affair.” The friend asks, “With who?” The blonde says, “Some guy named ‘Anonymous.'”
18. What’s the definition of a blonde? A body that grows hair.
19. How is a blonde like a screen door? You can see right through her.
20. What do you call 10 blondes in a freezer? Frosted flakes.

Blonde Jokes Collected from Reddit

1. A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Is this some kind of joke?”
2. My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home. I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening! She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. It was a good time. (Okay, not a blonde joke, but Reddit loves it).
3. What’s a blonde’s favorite song? The Alphabet Song.
4. Why did the blonde have a bruised belly button? From all the dumb blondes she hangs out with.
5. Two blondes were walking in the woods and came across a set of tracks. The first blonde said, “These look like deer tracks.” The second blonde said, “No, they look like bear tracks.” They argued for hours, and were still arguing when the train hit them.
6. A blonde goes to the doctor and says, “Doctor, I broke my arm in three places!” The doctor says, “Well, stop going to those places.”
7. A blonde suspects her boyfriend is cheating. She buys a gun and finds him in bed with another woman. She points the gun at her own head. The boyfriend yells, “No, honey, don’t do it!” She replies, “Shut up, you’re next!”
8. Why did the blonde get fired from the banana stand? She couldn’t find the secret ingredient.
9. A blonde walks into a library and says loudly, “I’ll have a cheeseburger and a large fries.” The librarian whispers, “This is a library.” The blonde whispers back, “Oh, sorry. I’ll have a cheeseburger and a large fries.”
10. A blonde and a lawyer are on a plane. The lawyer says, “Let’s play a game. I’ll ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me one, and if I don’t know, I’ll pay you $500.” The blonde agrees. The lawyer asks, “What’s the distance from the Earth to the Moon?” The blonde gives him $5. She then asks, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?” The lawyer is stumped and gives her $500. He asks, “Well, what’s the answer?” The blonde gives him $5.
11. What do you call a blonde in a freezer? A frosted flake.
12. A blonde is on a date. Her date says, “Tell me something about yourself.” She says, “I’m not a natural blonde.”
13. How do you make a blonde’s day? Tell her she’s pretty. How do you make it better? Agree with her.
14. Why did the blonde bring a stepladder to the party? She heard the drinks were on the house.
15. A blonde girl asked her mom, “Can I have a baby?” Her mom said, “No, honey, you’re too young.” The blonde said, “But all my friends are having them!”
16. How did the blonde die from drinking milk? The cow fell on her.
17. A blonde is filling out a job application. It says, “Under ‘Education,’ please write ‘N/A’ if not applicable.” So she wrote, “Not a pelican.”
18. A blonde is taking flying lessons. The instructor says, “Okay, now we’re going to practice a stall.” The blonde says, “I can’t, I have to go to the bathroom.”
19. What’s a blonde’s favorite part of a computer? The snack tray (CD-ROM drive).
20. Why do blondes drive convertibles? More headroom.

Best Blonde Jokes

1. Two blondes were trying to get into their car, which had locked keys inside. The first blonde says, “I can’t get this coat hanger to work!” The second blonde says, “Hurry up, it’s starting to rain and the top is down!”
2. A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks for a deodorant. The pharmacist says, “Ball or spray?” The blonde says, “Neither, it’s for my armpits.”
3. Why did the blonde have tire tracks on her back? From crawling back to town.
4. A blonde is on a game show. The host asks, “What is the capital of California?” The blonde says, “C.”
5. How do you know if a blonde has been in your fridge? There are footprints in the butter.
6. Why did the blonde give her computer a glass of water? To refresh the screen.
7. A blonde is flying a plane. She tells the control tower, “I’m running out of fuel. What should I do?” The tower says, “What is your position?” She says, “I’m sitting in the pilot’s seat.”
8. Why do blondes wear their hair in a ponytail? To keep it out of their eyes when they’re thinking.
9. A blonde is at a party. She sees a handsome man and asks him to dance. He says, “No thanks, I’m with my girlfriend.” The blonde says, “So? I’m with my husband, but you don’t see me making a big deal about it.”
10. A blonde and a brunette are driving in the desert. Their car breaks down. The brunette says, “I’ll take the water, you take the car door.” The blonde asks why. The brunette says, “If I get thirsty, I can drink the water. If you get hot, you can roll down the window.”
11. A blonde walks into a store and asks for a new battery for her remote. The clerk asks, “What kind?” She says, “The long kind.”
12. Why don’t blondes go to college? Because they can’t find the building.
13. What do you call a smart person in a room full of blondes? A tourist.
14. A blonde is visiting a farm. She sees a pig with a wooden leg. She asks the farmer, “What happened?” The farmer says, “That’s a special pig. He saved my life.” The blonde says, “So you ate him?” The farmer says, “A pig that special, you don’t eat all at once.”
15. A blonde calls the fire department and says, “My house is on fire!” They ask, “How do we get there?” She says, “Duh, in the big red truck!”
16. Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.
17. A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. Someone asks, “Where did you get that?” The pig says, “I won her in a raffle.”
18. Why was the blonde staring at the garden? She was trying to grow her own vegetables.
19. A blonde is on a date with a guy who says, “I love you.” She says, “Is that you or the beer talking?” He says, “It’s me, talking to the beer.”
20. A blonde and her friend are walking on the beach. The friend says, “Look, a dead bird.” The blonde looks up and says, “Where?”

Clever & Crazy Blonde Jokes

1. A blonde asked me for a book on paranoia. I whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
2. My blonde friend thinks a “food coma” is just a well-fed nap.
3. A blonde thinks a “software update” is just a new pillow for her computer.
4. Why did the blonde get a job as a lighthouse keeper? She liked the idea of a circular career path.
5. A blonde was asked to file her nails, so she threw them in the trash.
6. My blonde friend thinks “cloud storage” is a weather phenomenon.
7. A blonde thought “identity theft” was when someone copied her outfit.
8. Why did the blonde wear a life vest to the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house.
9. A blonde tried to make a reservation online, but the site crashed. She blamed it on “heavy traffic.”
10. My blonde friend thinks a “cursor” is someone who swears a lot.
11. A blonde thinks “Bluetooth” is a dental problem.
12. Why did the blonde get a PhD? So she could be a “Pretty huge Dork.”
13. A blonde thinks a “Trojan horse” is a special kind of pony.
14. My blonde friend thinks “spam” is just unwanted canned meat.
15. A blonde thought “phishing” was just a weekend hobby.
16. Why did the blonde put her phone in airplane mode? To see if it could fly.
17. A blonde thinks “RAM” is a male sheep.
18. My blonde friend thinks “Google Docs” is a team of internet doctors.
19. A blonde thinks “a bug in the system” is just an insect problem.
20. Why did the blonde put a thesaurus on her desk? To have a good word for everyone.